Sex in relationships can often cause difficulties. There can be issues between the couple around performance and anxiety, different levels of sexual drive, issues around porn or even around boundaries with different desires and preferences. Or it can be difficulties cause by illness, age or lack of privacy in the home.
Here at The Relationship Centre, we help couples explore what is often a sensitive subject to find a more positive place for this in their relationship.
Now We are 3
A relationship has many tests throughout its life. Moving from that heady early in-love feeling to adapting to a more steady relationship, then the changes in jobs, homes, and the effects of illness and loss can all impact on the relationship in different ways.
Others are more dramatic and harder to overcome. Affairs can be one of these.
But there is another situation which will change and challenge the relationship to the full. Bringing home your first child (and others that arrive later) will test your relationship, and often because of the joy your child brings, the struggling parts of the relationship are not noticed, or if they are, there’s hope it will ‘go back to what it was’ once the baby starts sleeping or is not so demanding. So often thoughts can be;
We’ll be more loving again I’m sure
Sex will become better again
We’ll be how we were
He/she won’t be as moody once they get more sleep
I’m sure they still love me
Sometimes the relationship does adapt and find a place, but for others it starts to struggle and it’s the beginning of a downward spiral. Our Now We Are 3 Therapy is tailored to help the couple develop a new and better relationship, capturing all the positives from before, but also developing and growing a better relationship now, so you can be parents, but also lovers and feel close and in love.
In this will will explore;
How to ignite your sex life
How to reintroduce romance again
How it’s natural for the man to feel jealous of the new child (and how to deal with this)
How to avoid post natal depression for both partners.
How to manage new conflicts in the relationship
How to organise and share ‘those chores’ in a positive way
How to learn ‘soft start-ups’ so you can get what you need from your partner
How to understand and deepen your relationship with your partner and your child.
How to change a disaster relationship into a master relationship
The therapy is in 1 hour sessions with occasional catch-ups between session if needed. In an ideal world, each session is with you as a couple, but as child-care can be a problem, occasionally seeing you individually can also be a positive way forward.
Its suggested that a minimum of 6 sessions is a good figure for a chance to put in place some of the learning, and to review and support from that point.
What Is An On-Line Affair?
What is an on-line affair?
Cheating online – also referred to as an online affair or Internet infidelity – is any behaviour conducted through any digital communication device (e.g. phone, tablet, laptop) that someone believes betrays their relationship.
But different people have different values over this. Is just talking on-line OK? What constitutes an affair?
The counselling will explore this with a couple to help them move beyond this and rebuild their relationship.
Read about our Affair Recovery Counselling which works with affairs that are physical, emotional or on-line.
Relationship Counselling for the Over 60’s
Relationships play a critical role in dealing with the pressures of old age, but can fracture if they are not nurtured. Illness, retirement and financial burdens, as well as worries about getting older or even death, can all impact on this new phase of the relationship.
This relationship counselling is designed to work with the over 60’s and the special circumstances of their life and relationship.
Men in Counselling
Men are sometimes resistant to coming into relationship counselling. The reasons can be many, but generally men find the thought of counselling as a negative thing, whereas a woman sees it as positive, and a chance to improve the relationship. Men sometimes are not comfortable in opening up about their feelings or vulnerabilities and worry about this. Of course most find the counselling much more positive than they imagined and are glad they attended the counselling once they start. If you are a man and you’re worried about the counselling, speak to us first or even make an appointment (can be a 25 min consultation appointment) to talk over your worries.
Single & Lonely?
Although not relationship counselling with two people, this therapy helps someone come to terms around a lost relationship, either one that has ended, or one that has never happened. It looks at the loss, the loneliness and the implications in society of being in a non-relationship.
Gradually through the therapy, these issues are worked through and a new way of feeling about yourself and your current circumstances can be discovered.
Many couples come to counselling in crisis to save their relationship, but for some, the visit is to explore how they can make the relationship even stronger, not seeing that they have major issues, but more about becoming even better at doing a relationship.
Ben Fogle, the TV presenter is someone who uses this approach.
“I had always assumed counselling was something for those whose marriage was in jeopardy, not for those who have just had a ridiculous argument.”