Entitlement can cause issues in personal relationships, particularly in the context of affairs. Entitlement refers to the belief that one deserves certain privileges or special treatment, regardless of circumstances or the impact on others. In affairs, this sense of entitlement can shape behaviour, justify actions, and influence the dynamics between those involved. This creates a safety in the betrayer as not having to take ownership of their behaviour.
Entitlement is a psychological state in which an individual feels inherently deserving of something, whether it be affection, attention, loyalty, or material benefits. This can develop from personal values, upbringing, social status, or previous experiences. In relationships, entitlement may manifest as expectations that one's needs should be constantly met over those of their partner.
In affairs, entitlement can play a significant role. Individuals who engage in extramarital or secret relationships may feel justified in seeking fulfilment outside their relationship. This justification can be rooted in a belief that their emotional or physical needs are not being met, and that they therefore have the right to pursue those needs elsewhere.
• Self-Justification: A person may rationalise their actions by believing they deserve happiness, excitement, or validation, even if it comes at the expense of their partner.
• Minimising Responsibility: Entitlement can lead to a dismissal of the consequences of an affair, with the individual focusing on their own needs rather than the potential harm to others.
• Expectations of Forgiveness: Those who feel entitled may expect forgiveness or understanding from their partner, believing their actions are reasonable given the circumstances.
The presence of entitlement in affair recovery can have profound effect on a successful outcome . Feelings of betrayal, loss of trust, and emotional distress are common experiences for those who discover a partner’s affair, particularly when entitlement has driven the behaviour. It can hinder honest communication, creates an avoidance of ownership, and creates more dishonesty within the recovery process.
Overcoming entitlement in affairs requires self-reflection and genuine consideration of others’ feelings and perspectives. Open communication, empathy, and a willingness to acknowledge and address underlying issues are essential steps towards repairing the damage caused by a betrayal. Seeking out a professional for support may be the best way to untangle the damage the affair, but also the ‘right to betray’ belief by the entitled partner.